Communication 101

The number one complaint from pastors regarding their student minister is: lack of communication. You think it would be skating off the hand rails in front of the sanctuary or backing the church van into the parking stop at BeefObradys wing house. But no, the top complaint from pastors or supervisors is the lack of information. Few things frustrate a senior pastor or administrator more than being unaware of what is going on, especially when it is exceptionally great or potentially problematic. Make it a priority to update the staff, shoot an email or drop a flier their way prior to a ministry event. It takes a bit more planning and time but communicating well will pay future dividends to you and the ministry. When your butt is in a sling, about to get chewed on or a black eye is headed your way, communication can be your biggest ally. And just in case you doubt it; one day you are going to get a black eye and your butt is going to get in somebody’s sling – so just communicate; better yet, over-communicate, super-saturate the staff, parents and youth. I have never heard of a parent or staff member in ANY student ministry anywhere say: “You know, our student pastor is excessive in keeping us in the loop. I wish he would lighten up on the communication a bit.”

Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.” Ephesians 4:25

Partner With Parents, Don't Compete!

Student Ministry is not a game of “us” against “them”. The “us” being the students and their illustrious captain and leader and “them”  being the parents and gray hairs. Younger youth leaders have to fight the urge to view questioning parents as “them”. Sometimes even older leaders tend to overlook them in favor of a more compliant man power source such as intern staff. Learn to see parents and other adults as part of the ministry team, each with a gift and talent to contribute. The more comfortable, inclusive, and informative you become with parents, the more likely they are to sing your praises all over town. And since they are going to sing something, it might as well be your praises!

"From whom the whole body fitly joined together and compacted by that which every joint supplieth, according to the effectual working in the measure of every part, maketh increase of the body unto the edifying of itself in love." Ephesians 4:16  "Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and [that] there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment." 1 Corinthians 1:10

Small Group Truth: Know Names

In small groups, strive to learn every students name as soon as possible. In larger groups this can be a challenge but doable. In huge groups, this may be impractical or nearly impossible. It should always be someone’s responsibility to KNOW the students name. So according to the size of ministry, if it is not you, make certain someone on the team is on top of it – like small group leaders. Nothing breaks down barriers with students, especially peripheral or visiting youth like calling them by name. It communicates to students that you take a personal interest in serving them. Also, try to avoid the habit of using generic camouflage names like: sport, buddy, man, girl, or friend. Students will only give you a "pass" for so long. In most cases, the use of generics simply increases the suspicion that you don’t know who you are speaking to. Your ministry will be greatly enhanced and attractive if students hear their name. A survey was conducted among elementary kids and the question was asked: What is love? Billy, age 4 said: "When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.” 
Remember:  “Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.” Proverbs 17:28   "Fear not: for I have redeemed you, I have called you by name; thou art mine." Isaiah 43:1